Naughty rude words

Back on Monday, I decided to pop into Blackwells bookshop on the university campus during my lunchbreak.

Shortly after I'd got myself nicely settled in a comfy chair with a good book, the woman sitting opposite asked if I could help her.

"Yes, no problem," I replied.

"You see, I'm slightly dyslexic," she went on, "and I sometimes have a problem with certain words."

The book she was reading just happened to be Fifty Shades Of Grey.

"PLEASE don't let it be a rude word, PLEASE don't let it be a rude word!" I silently pleaded.

The word turned out to be 'anticipated'.

The one after that was the rude one.

I just happened to be reading about the deplorable private lives of the ancient Roman emperors at the time, so I suppose she thought I wouldn't mind.